August 2009
3 posts
Would you be homeless (meaning "living on the...
I know the conservative stance on homelessness is that it’s basically a long-term vacation for the lazy, but that seems a little unlikely so fucking stupid. Posed with this question, I imagine Michelle Bachmann would reason that, “You should never give a homeless person a million dollars because they will probably spend it on drugs,” and Dick Armey would add, “Welfare...
Would you masturbate overtly and loudly in a...
I love the getting-down-like-David-Duchovny-at-a-drunken-office-Xmas-party questions because I am pretty much always willing to do dares that would get me fired real quick like and then ”punish” me with a million dollars. It’s like, “Oh, no! Please don’t give me a way out of this 40 hour a week Sartre play and then, double please, please don’t give me a...
Would you give a close older relative (say, your...
First of all, this is different than asking if you’d pose for Beaver Hunt or Swingin’ Shlongs XXX and then give your dad a copy of the issue — in which you’ve written ”Happy Yom Kippur!” or “A Festive D-Day to You, Great Aunt Birdie!!!” in all the margins. No one’s even asking you to put a bullwhip up your ass, Mapplethorpe style, and then...