I’m, unfortunately, crazy busy today, so here’s a favorite from the vaults:

I love me some Unknown Pleasures and some Substance (although, I’ve got to be honest: Permanent really tests my patience for repackaging and preys on the nerdy need to have every version of every song; and I haven’t listened to Closer as much as I maybe should have, depending on who you ask (because a fair amount of people are pretty meh on it); and despite their limited output, this is one of the most bootlegged bands ever, so at a certain point, you have to just simmer the fuck down), but this strikes me as a really fucking hard dare. I have a lot of memories associated with Joy Division’s songs – non-stop dance parties in super packed, super dark make-out rooms; tingly, dizzyingly romantic early date moments when Joy Division filled the nervous silences; even sobbing at the desperately sad parts of Control. But having anything piped directly into my head for every single moment of every single day right up until the moment I die just raises a red flag with the words YOU WILL LOSE YOUR GODDAM MARBLES on it. Already, sometimes my thoughts flicker and race through my brain so fast I can barely keep track of them or put them into words; I get nervous just thinking about the additional distraction of round-the-clock Joy Division mucking up things in there even more. You know how maddening it can be to have a song stuck in your head, right? I used to find it so impossible to stop tracks from looping in my brain as I was trying to fall asleep that I’d literally — honest to god — have to picture myself physically turning off the song from a source: iPod/CD player/record player/radio. If that didn’t work, I’d be forced to imagine myself shooting the singer — even singers that I love (hence the fact my brain decided to play them in heavy rotation in my head). That had about a 70% success rate, in case you’re curious. This dare would be a million times worse than that, and I just know I’d end up point-of-no-return crazy — kind of like acting out my own, tragic, voices-in-my-head version of She’s Lost Control. So, in case it’s unclear, I say no. Sorry my dears — but your songs will always have a place in my heart. And that goes for you too, New Order.